Politeness was encouraged in my family. Say please, and thank you for services rendered and acts of kindness such as someone holding a door or assisting with carrying a heavy object.
So contrary to how I was raised, I was annoyed when I heard a woman thank a student-aged employee for working on July 1st, a holiday weekend in the USA. She said, “Thank you for being here.” You see, folks, I had my first job at 14. No one thanked me for working over Christmas; I thanked them for giving me a job! I made money. It was an age-old transaction—labor for currency. I was happy to buy presents for my family without using my allowance. And the bonus was that someone trusted me enough to hire me and work for their company.
During the pandemic, laborers risked their lives to service the country, and they earned the gratitude we all displayed for showing up to work and facing our collective fears. However, we are no longer in that state, and it appeared to me that this customer had been conditioned to thank someone for going to work and was sending a subliminal message to this young worker that having a job and being paid for it was doing a favor to society. She wasn’t the girl’s supervisor, so there was more to this interaction.
I’ve seen this happen quite a few times now, so I’ll add a layer of complexity to the conversation. The one common thread is that the people being thanked are always minorities. It’s the definition of a quagmire that’s been created by societal confusion. The confluence of guilt, appeasement, prejudice, apathy, and need all rolled into a mucky pool of complexity and spit out with the words, “Thank you for being here.” Are the expectations for certain subgroups of minorities so low that we have to thank them for everything they do so that they participate in society and stay off welfare? Is it appeasement to keep a segment of society quiet and working? Or maybe it’s thought that they are so incapable of success they need handholding and mothering to fit into our culture. Or worse, a passive-aggressive way of making someone feel less of a citizen because they are in a blue-collar job. I’m not sure, but I’ve never heard a young European American being thanked for showing up to a job at a cash register on a holiday weekend.
In addition, this occurred over the July 4th weekend, our national holiday that celebrates America’s Independence from the British Empire and its oppressive power over its colonies. It’s a holiday that celebrates our self-rule. So in the spirit of this concept, Webster’s definition of the word Independence is here. Ask yourself if this cashier was being encouraged to be independent or if the customer was undermining her unwittingly or on purpose. Independence should be in our hearts, and we should promote individual freedom. In my opinion, we shouldn’t have to thank someone for showing up to work and being independent.
“INDEPEND’ENCE, noun [in and dependence.]
1. A state of being not dependent; complete exemption from control, or the power of others; as the Independence of the Supreme Being.
2. A state in which a person does not rely on others for subsistence; ability to support one’s self.
3. A state of mind in which a person acts without bias or influence from others; exemption from undue influence; self-direction. independence of mind is an important qualification in a judge.
Declaration of Independence the solemn declaration of the Congress of the United States of America, on the 4th of July 1776, by which they formally renounced their subjection to the government of Great Britain.”